Trouble

Well my humour got me into trouble this week. I was on the Aurora and towards the end of my act TWO very large people (I'm being kind) sitting in the front row, got up and walked out. (to be fare they probably thought I was finished.) Well I defy any comedian not to take advantage of the situation. So I chased after them. Come back I shouted, I get better. They didn't hear me so I stopped them. They looked very embarrassed. I said where are you going. Surely not for more food.....I know its been 45 minutes but you must be able to hold on. Well they didn't come back they just carried on. So I said Ok if there is anybody standing at the back there is room for 4 down here. The audience roared. I laughed as well and it was me who said it. Anyway the next day the Cruise director said they put in an official complaint. I did feel bad for a little while but when your thinking on your feet and someone walks out on you, a man has to do what a man has to do. We sent them some pies and they were alright. I hope they will eventually see the funny side. Someone said I was fattist....I said I think you'll find they were fattist....(Jimmy Carr 2205 Royal Variety show)
I've been told you like to read about my funny exploits in my blog. So I'll keep you up to date.
bye.

What a cheek.

I received a cutting from a Scottish newspaper from a friend. I think it was the Sun. They were talking about how female binge drinkers were being compared to men "If you drink like a man you may finish up looking like a man" (or something like that) Then they said, so dont drink to much ladies or might end up looking like Allan Stewart, and they had a picture of me as Dame last year.......what a fucking liberty.
I hope my updated web site will be up and running soon. Not to much change but I have a few new photos, a review section, and a video on there. I also hope to add videos as I go along.
Jane and I went to the Isle of Wight to see David and his band. He opened the Big Top stage on the Saturday. It was a massive gig for a young boy who has only worked live in 4 small venues. I know I'm biased but he really rose to the occasion.
Paul Elliott and I went up to Edinburgh to launch Aladdin (with the 3D genie) its going to be great this year. We also auditioned for a princess and we found a beautiful girl who was Miss Scotland and Miss UK. (Nieve Jennings) Not only does she look great she is a lovely actress and singer. So we are all set. Mr. Stott was on great form when we did the Q and A with the audience at the launch. Ok I wont leave it so long till the next time.
Bye